Month: September 2019 (Page 1 of 2)

Last Sunday we launched our series Sinners and Saints, and for the next 4 weeks we’ll be talking about the bigger questions that come up after things get personal – when we start dealing with the challenges of getting real with real human beings.

In my sermon, I talked about Esther Perel’s book The State of Affairs and how it breaks open the conversation on broken trust. There’s one moment Perel talks about that I keep thinking about – the moment when everything changes. The moment we discover that someone we love has broken our trust.

Like, the moment I described on Sunday when I overheard my friend talking about me…..or, the moment we discover alcohol in our sober parent’s cup, or that our child has been skipping school, or, the text on our partner’s phone that is too intimate. The moment when the hero we held up as a model for our lives does something – despicable.  

In these sorts of moments, not only do we lose trust in a person we love, but we lose trust in ourselves. We feel foolish, like we should’ve seen it. 

But what Perel reminds us is that actually – we couldn’t have seen it.  Our brains won’t let us. It’s a “sophisticated self-protective mechanism known as trauma denial – a type of self-delusion that we employ when too much is at stake and we have too much to lose.”

I find this so helpful.  It reminds us that there’s no way to see what we cannot see.  We can’t be more alert to it, or somehow “sufficiently” suspicious.  We can only see what we can see – knowing that there’s a lot we can’t see.  And it’s not defective that we can’t see everything – it’s protective.  
To live and to love is to risk trust being broken – it’s a part of the deal.  And yet choosing to trust, to lean in, to believe that even if/when trust is broken, it need not be the end of the story – it’s worth it.  It’s what makes life LIFE.  

I hope you’ll join us this Sunday when REV(!) Kristen keeps the conversation going this Sunday with a service on blame and responsibility.  

The Tao says, “if you don’t trust the people, they become untrustworthy.” Usually from this, we lean into the corollary – when you trust people they become trustworthy. But adrienne maree brown invites instead, is the realization that when we trust the people WE become trustworthy. This week, lean into this awareness – and the power that comes when choosing to trust.
 
In partnership,
Rev. Gretchen 
Senior Minister
Foothills Unitarian Church
Unleashing Courageous Love 
 
P.S. Since some of you have asked….I can’t remember if I won that 7th Grade election! Isn’t that funny – I remember the fight, but I can’t at all remember the result of the thing we were technically fighting about….hmmmm…

Notes from Sinners & Saints: Week 1 – Trust Me 

• Listen to the message 

Text / Readings 

• In the 8:30, we read Trust by Thomas R. Smith 
• In the 11:30, we read the poem Good Bones by Maggie Smith

Practices 

1. Lovingkindness Meditation. Here’s the lovingkindness meditation we offered in our third service.  If you’re looking for a meditative community of practice, join us on Monday nights.  
2. Soul Collage. If you’re new to this practice, we’re offering a Soul Collage Workshop on October 12th – sign up here.  

Resources 

• The State of Affairs by Esther Perel
• Brene Brown’s Anatomy of Trust 
• Dear White People on Netflix 
• How to Build Trust in Your Relationship by John Gottman 

Terms like sinner or saint tend to make us uncomfortable. Instead of original sin, we prefer original blessing. Inherent worth and dignity. We want to talk about complexity, shades of gray.

But then — like our last series said it: it gets personal. Someone we trust betrays us, or lies to us. Someone shares their ideas that violate our sense of goodness, equality, justice. Someone we admire acts selfishly, says something racist, sexist — hateful — sometimes even on purpose.

In these moments, we often feel caught. Caught in simplified ideas about other people — who to trust, when and how to forgive, and who deserves what in life. And, caught in an old binary of either judgment, or boundary-less compassion. Either we let it go, tell them “I love you anyway,” or “you’re still a good person;” or, we end the relationship. Sometimes passively, sometimes urgently. We think: we can’t engage with someone so unhealthy, wrong, even — evil.

But the core of our faith says there’s another way. One that doesn’t divide the whole world up into heroes and villains — and instead says: none of us is ever reducible to our best, or our worst acts. One that embraces the reality that we are all sinners, and saints fully, and always. We can and do harm each other, and ourselves. And, we are capable of generosity, selflessness, beauty.

Whatever is true in this moment, and wherever any of us are in our lives, or where Life is now, it’s not the end of the story. When we open ourselves to this truth, we make room for grace, and real healing to show up.

It’s this path that we invite you to explore with us in the coming weeks in our series, Sinners and Saints. We’ll be delving into what happens after things get personal — and the practices that help us break free from the binary, and commit ourselves to a vision of humanity that is grounded in courageous love, and the (risky, often-painful) choice we have to trust each other, and the larger universe — through it all.

Rev. Gretchen

Series Spiritual Practices

Lovingkindness Meditation
This Buddhist practice is a practice of developing compassion and connection with all of life. It invites us to first practice compassion for ourselves, then for others, then, for all of life, in an ever-increasing circle of connection and love. You can find many examples online, and we’ll be practicing this throughout the series in our 11:30 service.

Sinners & Saints Soul Collage
SoulCollage® is a method of self-discovery through the creation and intuitive analysis of collaged cards. More information at soulcollage.com and look for a workshop at Foothills the morning of Saturday, Oct. 12. More info at foothillsuu.org/signup

CJM helps lead spontaneous participation of eco-groups
to grab control of fracking in our community. 

Right here, right now. This is what I need to be doing, I thought as I pep talked myself to the podium this past Friday.  In five minutes, to three people representing the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, I introduced myself from Climate Justice Ministry of Foothills Unitarian Church and described our work. It was a public hearing on whether or not to downgrade Colorado’s air quality to “serious.”

This moment in state history is part of Gov. Polis’ strategy — our previous Governor asked for an 18-month suspension to federal intervention for our state’s unhealthy air, with the idea that we might reverse course and avoid the trouble. But, with the growing number of wells, no amount of industry tweaks would make this situation winnable. So, Polis actually asked to rescind the request for extension. Flunk us now. Tell us what to do. Help. 

Perhaps you or someone near you has a persistent “summer cold”? Or you suffer asthma and are acutely aware of the many “Stay indoors” warnings we now get. Our state has fallen from grace regarding its once blue sky reputation. The poison we inhale from thousands of oil and gas wells east of us makes us sick in more ways than most of us realize — and science now has proof. 

The good news? Colorado Senate Bill 181 recently passed to give us local control of oil and gas development — and super important — to insist that the regulation of oil & gas PRIORITIZE Health, Safety & the Environment. Formerly, it was weighed against industry profit. How much of a hit to our health were we willing to take for the money? Well, it’s a lot of money (for Weld County), and those many debilitating symptoms are anecdotal, so they said. 

When SB-181 passed, local leaders sprung up, banded together to make a plan. We’re hopeful that we can now legally stop wells from being next to schools and homes, from hogging millions of gallons of precious water to frack. Now we’re rolling like a snowball downhill. We are banded as the Larimer Alliance for Health, Safety & the Environment. 

Our pace must keep us abreast of Larimer County, which selected a 15-member task force of which 2/3 have industry ties. The county’s aim is to roll out its rules for local control as soon as October. Applications are pending for about 40 wells, some by bad actors — companies known for accidents, mistakes, and failure to prepare or mitigate. Some are very near neighborhoods. Bethke Elementary School in Timnath now has a well. Terry Lake has one coming. Loveland is an easy target because fewer of its citizens are opposed. 

We’re uncertain why our county managers insist on rushing, since stalled profit is no longer a lead consideration. We’ve asked that they slow down until the new Colorado Oil and Gas Commission has had the time to announce new rules for the state, based on the new criteria. We are bracing for what we’ve been told will be a formal NO at this week’s commissioner meeting. 

It’s far easier to stop bad laws or influence their making than to reverse, amend or repeal. This is our moment. 

Larimer Alliance is preparing our next requests for rules to ensure the safest development. We are calling all support to make the groundswell of concerned citizens obvious. We consistently appear and comment at Tuesday morning commissioner meetings, we intend to fill the room at Task Force meetings, canvas neighborhoods, write press releases, host educational events, walk in parades… and anything else we can think of to show we are united and strong in our determination to protect OUR community. If you’ve wondered how to fight climate change in a way that matters — start with your home. 

I told the EPA on behalf of CJM and the Larimer Alliance: The terrible air we breathe cannot stand more; scientific instruments show Larimer County residents are breathing a lot of poison from the nation’s most fracked county, just across the road from us. We’d like to talk to Weld County about all the money it enjoys while all we get is sick, but we’ve been advised to not engage — because Weld Commissioners are in a legal thicket trying to convince the state that “local control” should also allow FEWER rules. So, I said to the EPA, please downgrade our state to Serious bad ozone. HELP US with pressure from the Fed to recognize our right to BREATHABLE AIR. 

Air is just one of many issues surrounding oil and gas development. We’ve so much to cover. Can you help? Your presence is needed. Here’s some dates and events where you can stand up for the climate justice in your own backyard:

1. Every Tuesday 9 am, County Courthouse: just listen, or speak. If uncertain on speaking, Larimer Alliance can offer what you might say. 
   
2. Monday, 9/16 6:30 p.m., General meeting of all groups strategizing for Larimer Alliance (you’ll have to ask in person for the place).
   
3. Friday, Sept. 27, 5:30 p.m. Old Town Square Climate Action Strike by Defend Our Future.
   
4. Friday, Oct. 4, 4 p.m. Canvas Stadium, CSU Homecoming Parade

For more information, visit LarimerAlliance.org, check out the Climate Justice Ministry calendar of events and join our group at Foothills. 

I invite you to feel the energy of this diverse group of people making things up as we go towards goals that are quite measurable, all the more possible, and unflinchingly necessary.

Kristen Psaki,
Assistant Minister for Beloved Community

by Jane Everham, Hospitality Team Member

Anyone sick of seeing my name in the Order of Service every Sunday? Do you wonder how to get your name in the Order of Service?

It’s easy. And would it surprise you to learn that my volunteerism comes not as much from my generous heart as from my hedonistic nature? I volunteer at church Sunday after Sunday because:

• It feels good.

• I get to greet and see so many of my fellow congregants – new and familiar.

• I receive tons of gratitude for being so generous with my time.

• And it feels so good to give back to this church that gives me so much.

It is a crazy, scary, confused world out there and coming to church each Sunday is what is keeping me tethered to sanity, optimism and hope.

Help me feel less guilty for hogging all the cool volunteer jobs each Sunday. And do yourself a favor by signing up to join the Hospitality Team.