Day: November 14, 2019

Listen to the reflection here.

Hello. Good morning! I’m Teri Ashley.

I was here two weeks ago, when Reverends Sean and Gretchen introduced the theme of Discipline and invited us to share three practices over the course of this month. They asked, “Who was in … 100%?” and I held my hand up high. I like the idea of embracing practices that add meaning to life.  I like experimenting. 

In addition to challenges, I love accountability, so I thought I’d give you an update today regarding those prayer beads…

Historically I have not been much of a pray-er. However, when my mom died seven years ago, I was overcome with what the experts call “complicated grief.” Mom and I had had a brutal falling out 20 years before, and we’d JUST managed to negotiate a truce before she died. I had deep-seated hope for a mother/daughter peace treaty, but that never happened. My first act of self-care was to take my sad self to a silent retreat center for four days because I was so afraid of what I might say out loud. While I was at that center, poking around their book shop for something transformational, I found myself wildly attracted to a set of rosary beads. It felt wrong to take them home – I don’t identify as a Christian — but the thought of those beads wouldn’t let me go. So, after I returned home, I built a personal rosary: a special bead for each person in my life who knew me well and loved me with kindness and compassion. When I went to bed at night, heart heavy with thoughts of my mom, I would run those bead through my hands and recite all those names by heart. So much of creating a joyful life is learning to focus with gratitude on what we have rather than focusing on what’s missing.

So these prayer beads, the ones we’re sharing here at church, really light my fire because they connect me gratefully with all of you. I love going to bed at night and remembering this enlightening, challenging, sustaining, beloved community.  I love knowing you’re saying these prayers too. 

I’ve gotta confess that I’ve renamed the beads — well the blue breathe beads are the same — but I was having trouble remembering the names of all the other ones without my paper, so I‘ve given them simpler names: grounding, gratitude, grace, listen and love. Three “G”s and two “L”s.  Grounding, gratitude, grace, listen and love. The meaning behind them stays the same, but now I can say my prayers with the lights off.

I especially like the GRACE bead: it’s about taking a fearless moral inventory and forgiveness. It reminds me to value the tangles that come with our blessings. When I get to the LOVE bead, I still stay the names of all the people who know me and love me with kindness and compassion. Over time, I find more and more of these people here in this space.  I also try to remember the names and faces of the strangers I meet every day: the grocery clerk, the waiter, the bank teller. I wish them well, too. Every night, I ask myself if there are any amends I need to make, any forgiveness to offer.

I think of this ritual as a way to un-knot some of those tangles while I still have time. And I think of all of us doing this together, a way of sending silky, shiny filaments of love to each other every night. Ram Dass says, “At the end of the day, we’re all just walking each other home.” Instead I think, when we say our prayers, connecting with one another, we’re all tucking each other into bed.

Thank you for joining me in this practice.

When Sean decided to preach on sacrifice, I knew it would likely bring up a lot of feelings for people. It’s a charged word – and a complicated topic.

Except, I also kept thinking that it should be a really comfortable topic for our community. Because actually, we are good at sacrifice. 

Not sacrifice like, human sacrifice in the Temple of Doom, of course. But still, sacrifice where we give up a part of ourselves because we know it will serve a greater love. Sacrifice that breaks our heart wide open. Sacrifice is a necessary part of courageous love.

For example. In February 2017, our congregation decided to move to three services on Sunday.

We all thought this was generally an awful idea – it would require so many volunteers, an exhausting experience for the worship leaders, and the time for fellowship would be reduced to basically nothing.

And yet, given that we were seeing over 350 adults on Sundays, and our worship space holds 320 at a maximum, we knew that if we were going to welcome all those who seek our community, we needed to do it anyway.

It would be a sacrifice – a collective one. And we said yes – because it was and is who we are.

I’ve been thinking about sacrifice a lot over the last few weeks, as we’ve been laying the groundwork for our official launch of our capital campaign.

In order to decide on the right goal for our campaign, we’ve reached out to a small group of leaders to see if they were willing to make a commitment that could be an inspiration for others, and wow.

I have been overwhelmed to hear about the willingness that exists among us to give in ways that will be much harder than having coffee on the patio in winter. A willingness to give in ways that will create so many possibilities for Unitarian Universalism in Northern Colorado for many, many years to come.

How much have your fellow Foothills members and friends committed to so far? You’ll have to come on Sunday to find out! We’ll be kicking off the Campaign this Sunday – so we’ll share the goal – along with a whole bunch of other fun stuff during and between the services.

One of the things we’ll be exploring this Sunday is how what we focus on grows. If you want to grow your sense of human generosity and possibility – join us this Sunday! I’m excited and I so hope you can be there! 8:30, 10, or 11:30.

In partnership,
Rev. Gretchen

Notes from Disciplined: Week 3: Who Me? Sacrifice?  
Listen to the message

Music
Divisionary (Do the Right Thing) by Ages and Ages
At 10 we sang All that I Am
At 11:30 we sang Ever from Heatherlynn

Practices 
Share in a collective practice using our Disciplined Practice Guide. 
In our 11:30, we experienced our Prayer Bead practice together, which you can find on page 3 of the Guide or in this audio recording. 
Text COMMIT to 970-00 to be a part of our tips and reminders throughout the series

Text
We offered this poem from Mary Oliver as our Call to Worship
We adapted this prayer for Veteran’s Day from Amy Petrie Shaw at 8:30

Resources
Check out the message from Rev. Karen Hutt that includes a summary of the story, “Space Invaders,” that Sean told on Sunday.

Remember Often when we talk about sacrifice, we are asking those who are already marginalized or disempowered to give up even more to maintain the status quo. Yet, courageous love asks us to consider what we are willing to give for a collective liberation and wider justice.What is courageous love asking you to sacrifice on behalf of a greater good?